Posts Tagged ‘faith’

The Story Behind the Website: Part 1

Monday, September 19th, 2011


I never liked the computer. It was a big bulky thing that I didn’t know anything about. Up until I started my website, I only checked my e-mail once every three months, when someone on the phone told me to check it. I wrote real letters in my own handwriting with a pencil. I know, with my husband being a computer guru, you would think I would at least dabble with it, but no.

I had been a popular leader of a local Cub Scout group for a couple of years. We would zoom go-carts down hills, smash rocks until sparks would fly, and play on a home-made pirate ship off my back deck. The group of boys doubled in size from one year to the next. At the end of the second year, God moved my heart away from it.

You see, I was sleep deprived and overwhelmed, and you will understand why in a minute. (I thought I was going to have to adopt a bunch of teenagers.) I knew that I could not spend the 10 plus hours a week preparing for Cub Scouts any more: ordering and preparing materials, organizing field trips, and other planning. I resigned.

So how did the whole adoption thing come up? I was counseling someone over the phone every night in the middle of the night. When the phone rang, I would get out of bed, go to the living room, get on my knees, and beg God to give me the wisdom for this woman. To tell a woman in distress the wrong thing can cause huge ramifications. The woman made me swear to her that if she ended up dead, I would gain custody of her children. She would not let me hang up the phone one night until I promised to adopt her children if anything should happen to her.

Then something scary happened. I was having a casual conversation with God while doing laundry. I said, “If I’m going to have these extra children, I’m going to need a bigger washer/dryer.”

I told no one.

The next day a larger washer/dryer was rolling up our driveway. I nearly had a heart attack. This meant that the woman was going to be dead. I went white and looked like I was going to pass out.

Someone was upgrading their washer/dryer, and they were giving us their old dinosaur washer/dryer, which was way better than ours, and way bigger.

Trembling, I told my husband what I had flippantly said to God the previous day. My husband laughed. “That doesn’t mean anything.”

“This is not coincidence. Coincidence doesn’t exist, and you know it! God has control of every atom of this universe. He did this on purpose just to freak me out.”

“If God wants us to have these kids,” my husband said, “He will give us the strength to do so.” Wise man, my husband.

Several days later my husband looked back at our children in the van and said, “If those kids are joining us, we’re going to need a bigger van.”

“Stop it,” I said. But in my head I was re-arranging for homeschooling. If these children ended up being mine, I was not going to send them into the school system. I’m just not, I thought. I was figuring out how to do Civil War with high school as well as my own children, throwing in high school science and wondering what the children had already taken…

Suddenly I knew that no matter what happened, I would be able to do it. I had always wanted a large family. I was at peace; an exhilerating peace where I feel like I’m on a motorcycle, but I’m not the one driving. That’s actually a really good picture of what my yielding to God is like, quiet, yet thrilling in what He will do next.

Thank God the crisis was averted. God was building my faith, and I had passed the test.

(Stay tuned for part two…)