Last weekend my husband and I went on a date night to paint a canvas. It was so much fun! My sister gave us a gift card for Painting with a Twist for Christmas. I had been wanting to go on this creative date for several years now, so we finally did it. I chose a mountain scene with a lake and forest.
Both Alan and I have always liked the idea of painting on canvas, ever since watching Bob Ross as children. There is something relaxing about watching someone paint. And Bob Ross always made it look so easy. This painting class was the same way. The instructor took us step-by-step through the painting: first the sky, then the lake, the forest, and the mountain last.
The sky was interesting. We painted a white line for the horizon. Then we created a sunset, using reds, pinks, yellows, and blues. We added “fluffy little clouds.”
Next we painted the lake, along with its multi-colored ripples. Around the lake were the silhouettes of trees. Alan knew how to paint awesome trees, so he showed me how to zig-zag down the trunks of my trees.
Finally we painted the mountain. We used white paint to go from the peak downwards on the mountain, looking like layering of snow. We created purple and pink shadows along the length of it, always moving the brush downwards.
It was a really unique experience, as far as date nights go. I love how our paintings turned out!
I’m looking for more ideas for fun nights out as a couple (besides dinner), so in the comments, let me know: What are some unique date nights you’ve had with your spouse?
Maslow created a pyramid of basic human needs, where you have to get your most basic needs met before you are able to thrive. People in many cultures live on the bottom of the pyramid, without enough food and clean water. They are not able to get to the higher levels of fulfillment because they are always striving for the bare necessities.
Let’s take a look at the basic needs we have as human beings, and then we can talk about what we can do to advance to the higher levels of the pyramid to have more satisfaction in our lives.
Maslow’s Human Needs and Motivation
Maslow’s Needs: A Summary by Rachel Evans
The process is simple: the bottom of the pyramid must be fulfilled before the next tier can be unlocked and used. Follow this pattern on up to the top, and you have a pyramid of things you need to gain self-actualization! Let’s begin.
From lowest tier to highest:
– Psychological needs: You don’t have much freedom to do anything until you have your basic needs met, such as food, water, and the fact you’re not freezing to death every night.
– Safety and Security: Having a steady place to live can do a lot for your mind’s health. And knowing you’re in a secure neighborhood helps greatly.
– Love and Belonging: Knowing that you have good friends and family can serve as a great comfort when things don’t go as planned.
– Self-esteem: This is being comfortable with who you are, and feeling good about how others see you.
– Self-actualization: Being fulfilled in what you do with your life.
You’d be surprised at how many people are missing self-actualization.
How can we go up the pyramid for a more fulfilled life?
by Susan Evans
First we need to learn how to manage our finances so that we are not living paycheck to paycheck. Whether that means not eating out, cancelling cable, or downsizing to a smaller house or apartment, there is always something we can do to better ourselves and not squander what little we have.
We can ask the Lord what He would have us do to earn some extra cash, or show us items in our house that we can sell to pay off debt. And we can ask God to help us stop being greedy to buy more objects just to go into more debt. Dave Ramsey is good at teaching all this.
Once you have money saved up, you know that you will have a roof over your head, and that you will have enough food to make it through each month. Then you can think about safety and security. If you feel safe in your own home and in your relationships, and if you don’t feel like you are under attack all the time, you are able to relax. It’s hard to relax when you don’t feel safe. Do what you need to do to feel safe in the place where you live.
Once you have safe relationships and live in a relatively safe environment, you can move on to love and belonging. Spend quality time talking with people instead of just watching television or being on social media. Real life people can be an encouragement and can give you a hug when days are hard.
You can find a group of like-minded people, either in a church, a mom’s group, a homeschool group, or a hobby group so that you feel a sense of belonging. Of course, you can feel that in your own home, too.
You need to be comfortable with who you are, to understand your own strengths and weaknesses, and be able to to accept yourself and others for who they are, with all their flaws. Learning forgiveness is key, especially to prevent bitterness in relationships that are closest to you.
And last but not least, you should live out your calling. Ask God why He put you on this earth, find out what you are good at, and do what makes you thrive. When you are involved in helping others in some way to make this world a better place, you have a deep sense of fulfillment in your life.
Final tip: Don’t focus on what you are lacking. Be thankful for what you do have, and work towards a safer, more fulfilled life.
In case you are wondering what curriculum we are using for psychology, we are studying {affiliate link} Introduction to Psychology by 7 Sisters Homeschool. We are learning the basics of psychology while dramatizing what we learn in a fun way.
If you don’t want to miss any episodes from our psychology series, sign up for our monthly newsletter below!
Having lived in different cultures (Guatemala, England, and the USA), I have come to realize that nonverbal communication is vital to understand. Sometimes what a person is saying with words is not the same as what they are saying with their body language. I wrote a short poem about nonverbal communication with Guatemalans, since the British and Americans have a more reasonable sense of personal space:
Teen Girl Facing Nonverbal Conflicting Cues
Guatemalan teen boy
standing too close for comfort
diving in for a kiss on the cheek at church
a complete stranger
she holds back a slap
telling herself this is only cultural
or is it?
Yes, this actually happened to me! Not just once, but nearly every week, since I lived in a different culture. Now that I am in the United States, I am surprised at how far away people stand from each other, even when they are married. It seems cold…
Goofy Skits: Nonverbal Communication
Today my daughter and I will show you the basic types of nonverbal communication.
Communication: The World of Expression by Rachel Evans
Often we forget just how complicated communication is. Simply put, there’s always a balance of expressions and positions in conversation, and when the balance is off, we notice. This is the same even without talking. Mainly, there are three non-verbal cues that balance into a normal chat.
1. Distance: If you have ever been in a conversation and suddenly feel the need to take a step back, the person you were talking to was probably too close while chatting. Perhaps they have a different-sized personal bubble than you.
2. Gesture: You can tell a lot about someone’s mood by the movements they make. The easiest to read are facial expressions. Most facial expressions stay the same around the world, with some cultures being more expressive than others.
Body position is equally important. Leaning forward shows interest, while crossing arms usually shows disinterest in talking or the desire to have an argument.
3. Eye Contact: This is different depending on where you look in the world. Americans find long eye contact awkward and uncomfortable. Native Americans prefer a person to look at the ground while speaking, especially if the person is of a lower rank or status.
Paralanguage is equally important. This consists of variations of speech, like stresses on certain words, loudness, pitch, and rhythm. A sentence can have many different meanings depending on how the speaker says it.
Overall, communication is a complicated thing that most of us have expertise in identifying without even knowing it.
Now that my daughter’s portion is done, I challenged myself to write a poem about nonverbal communication in marriage. Here it is:
A Marriage Healed
A turned back
Shutting me out of your life
No more open heart
Gone away inwardly
When will things change
Get back the sparkle in your eyes
To connect and be together
Unified as one
Heartbreak persists
Arms hanging limp
Drooped shoulders
Trudging through the day
Until healing comes
Breaking forth as the morning rays
Warming not your back, but your face
At last we are one
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This episode was all about identifying the basic types of nonverbal communication.
To apply what we have learned, describe in the comments: What are some ways that you may have misread nonverbal communication in your interaction with others, especially those of different cultures?
In case you are wondering what curriculum we are using for psychology, we are studying {affiliate link} Introduction to Psychology by 7 Sisters Homeschool. We are learning the basics of psychology while dramatizing what we learn in a fun way.
Coming up next… What is Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, and how can we get these needs met to be fulfilled as human beings? (Sign up for our monthly newsletter below if you don’t want to miss a single episode.)
We are continuing our series of psychology videos by introducing three of the most famous psychologists of all time: Freud, Adler, and Jung. My daughter Rachel did a great job summarizing the fascinating ideas from each of these famous men, so we dramatized the concepts in this video:
Sigmund Freud by Rachel Evans
Freud invented an interesting map of the mind consisting of your conscious, subconscious, and unconscious mind: conscious being your thoughts and immediate wants, subconscious being your memories, and the unconscious being someplace difficult to get to which contains hidden desires you know nothing of.
The best idea Freud came up with was the one about the couch. There was a comfy couch, and he put his patients on the couch so they could talk to him about life.
He also invented the iceberg theory: that is, far less than one third of your mind is your conscious thought. Your decision-making is affected by the id, the ego, and the superego. The id is like your instinctual wants for immediate gratification. The superego is like your conscience, mixed with social norms. The ego is the mediator between the id and the superego, trying to make a compromise between them.
Alfred Adler by Rachel Evans
Alfred Adler! I like this guy, mostly because he was adventurous enough to get together a bunch of people and form his own little Psychology Society. He believed that everyone had a life goal they were striving for, and that translated into their lifestyle and short-term goals.
He also theorized that everyone naturally strives toward getting better at their skills, gaining positions of power, and so on, and that when a person feels that they can’t accomplish those things, they go into what Adler called an Inferiority Complex. He proposed that the feeling of inferiority depends on what the person defines as important. For example, a homeless man might feel hopeless and inferior because there’s not much he can do about his situation. If money is important to him, this may cause a feeling of inferiority. But if the man doesn’t care much for money, he could be homeless on the street and not feel inferior.
But what if a person isn’t homeless and inferior? Their lifestyle is categorized four ways:
~ Ruling Type: someone who is busy but shows no social interest (the desire to help people), someone who is more likely bossy and could end up homicidal. Watch your back.
~ Getting Type: neither busy nor showing social interest, someone who would be more interested in buying and getting a good deal.
~ Avoiding Type: neither busy nor showing social interest, but someone who is so afraid of being a failure that he avoids life to the best of his ability.
~ Socially Useful Type: both busy and socially interested, this person likes getting out into the world and solving problems. Sounds like Adler would be put under this type!
Alfred Adler was a man of many more ingenious ideas. One last one I’ll discuss is his theory that birth order may determine a person’s lifestyle. He determined that first children experience power, superiority, stress and pressure. The middle children usually learn to get along with lots of people, challenging the superiority of the older children. And finally, the younger children are often the ones who, by the time their parents get to them, get special attention and fewer strict rules. They also might have the most difficulty gaining independence from the household.
And so, Alfred Adler, who might just become my favorite psychologist, made many breakthroughs in awesomeness, although he was largely overshadowed by other more famous people. And guess what? He had four kids, and half of them became psychiatrists! I like that.
Carl Jung by Rachel Evans
Carl Jung’s grandfather was creepy and his parents argued a lot, some of which translated into this theory of introversion and extroversion: everyone has a personality that is inward thinking and external socializing. Also, each person has the following qualities:
Thinking: Most extroverts are objective and have concrete thoughts, and introverts are more subjective and are better at creating ideas.
Feeling: Extroverts are more socially aware and better at winning popularity, and introverts are better at roles that require careful thinking.
Sensation: The perception a person has on reality.
Intuition: Hunches that people have.
Perceiving: People who like to be spontaneous.
Judging: People who like to have a plan.
So… Jung sure did have lots to say about personality.
Other psychologists we studied from the 6th chapter of our psychology book are Victor Frankl and Joseph Breuer. Rachel summarized some of their views on the test she took for this chapter:
In case you are wondering what curriculum we are using for psychology, we are studying {affiliate link} Introduction to Psychology by 7 Sisters Homeschool. We are learning the basics of psychology while dramatizing what we learn in a fun way.
Coming up next… Have you ever stood too close to somebody, and they backed up from you? Learn more about non-verbal communication in our next episode. (Sign up for our monthly newsletter below if you don’t want to miss a single episode.)
Hi! I'm Susan Evans. I speak at homeschool conferences about hands-on learning and run a huge unit study membership site. I also speak at women's retreats on the topic of prayer.
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