When I told my husband what this bigot had said to me, his first reaction was, “How dare you talk this way to my wife? What gives you any authority at all over my wife?!”
The first Scripture that popped into my husband’s head was Proverbs 31. The Proverbs 31 woman conducted business with men without her husband present, and she had the full authority of her husband to be independent in this manner. She was also independent in ruling over her household activities. My own husband gives me freedom to research homeschooling materials and buy whatever I feel is right for our family. He also supports my online homeschool business, and he travels with me to homeschool conferences, and he allows me to be in the limelight. He enjoys that I’m a ham and I love the camera. I once saw him in the back of the room while doing my “Using Journals to Teach Writing” workshop at a homeschool conference. He was so proud of me, his eyes shone.
My husband rules me. But he cherishes me and is selfless. He loves who I am and I don’t feel suffocated. There is fresh air here where I live. I yield my thoughts to my husband, and I take on his thoughts, and he influences my mind, and I draw closer to God and feel excited in my spirit. The mystery of Christ and the church is here, where we are told to yield our spirits to Christ, and there is true freedom, and we are one, and it feels right to the core of my being.
But Proverbs 31 (which, by the way, is the iconic image of the godly woman) is not what my husband used to knock down what this man said. Instead, he poked holes in the man’s argument. Here is what he wrote:
“I read your interpretation of 1 Timothy to mean that no woman should ever make any public statement that might instruct or advise a man. Is that correct? I consider this to be a very rigid interpretation. I understand this interpretation and I understand from whence it comes, yet I disagree with it. Still, given that this is what you believe, I’m curious: If a woman has no liberty to speak where a man might learn then what makes you think that a man has any liberty to speak to another man’s wife? Particularly, sir, when dispensing advice on life and Godliness? Are you now responsible for my wife’s soul?
If your application of 1 Timothy is really that strict, then might I suggest that you direct complaints about my wife’s behavior to me, since I don’t think Scripture provides any liberty to speak to another man’s wife in that manner.
Now then, I don’t actually believe that is a proper application, otherwise, Priscilla was way out of line when she and Aquila instructed Apollos. (I suppose you might try to redeem your argument by claiming that this was acceptable because she was with her husband at the time, but then how do you know I was not with my wife when she wrote her blog post?)
I’ve been fervently and diligently searching the Word for at least as long as you, and I’ve found that, generally, when someone appeals to the authority of Scripture with statements like, “The Bible is very clear,” then they are preparing to follow up with claims that are not that clear, just as you have done. And I’m not sure if you were trying to sound prideful and arrogant when you accused Susan of being prideful and arrogant, but you nailed it if you were.
I could go on, but this is already wearisome to me…”
As you can see, my husband is my hero, and he has my full allegiance. I gladly yield to the man that God has put in authority over me.
I just gave a virtual high-five. 🙂
You both have such a way of putting your convictions into words. I love the way you talk about submitting sweetly when I know you aren’t one of those meek, mild & soft-spoken women to whom it seems to come naturally. It underscores that the issue is not temperament, but obedience to God. That removes all the excuses.
I, too, have a husband who gives me the freedom to manage our home. I appreciate his trust and thrive under him allowing me to live out my roles as well as who God created me to be as an individual. (Yes, I said “under.” And I won’t apologize for it. 😉
Woohoo! A woman who understands! I thought I would tick off everybody by calling this man a bigot. But as I said to my facebook friends:
Jesus called people names when they were hardened in their sin and looked down on other people. Jesus never considered women to be inferior but always treated them with honor and listened to them. If Jesus can listen to women, a random man shouldn’t get furious at me for posting a few suggestions of how men can lead their wives spiritually.
To consider the entire race of women inferior to the entire race of men is bigotry. I’m only labeling something correctly.
A bigot is a person obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices, especially one exhibiting intolerance, and animosity toward those of differing beliefs. (Wikipedia)
Seconding the virtual high-five, and extending it to your hubby as well. My son and I had a wonderful talk in the car about bigotry in many forms. Your post (and the Part I) are perfect examples of what we talked about.
Very good! Wonderful! I wonder if he is married? I have met men like this one before, and generally they are so weak in their own faith and understanding that they fear a woman strong in hers. I am so glad your husband did what he did!
People pick apart and rearrange scripture to suit their purposes, but when it comes down to it God did not mean a woman was to submit to all men. Anyway, good post.
Yes, he is married, and on his second marriage now.
How do you know this?
Because he went back and forth, and I only quoted a small portion of what he wrote.