Posts Tagged ‘Family Life’

Multitasking Burns Your Dinner

Saturday, June 30th, 2012

multitaskingAs I was cooking dinner one night, I wanted to make sure I didn’t miss the buzz of the dryer, because the load contained shirts that I didn’t want to wrinkle. Meanwhile my husband called and said he was going to be home late because of traffic. I hung up the phone, and my 11-year-old son started talking to me while I said, “Just a second. Rachel! Set the table please!” and I heard a “Yes, Mommy.” Meanwhile my son was talking, but I have no idea what he was saying because I heard the dryer buzz. I set down my spatula from the stir fry to go to the dryer. I quickly and efficiently folded all the shirts as fast as was humanly possible. My head felt thick as my son continued to jabber on and on. I still wasn’t listening to him because… oh, no! Dinner was burnt! I lifted the pan and turned off the burner, looking toward the dining room to make sure that my daughter had obeyed me about setting the table. She had. I set the pan down. I decided to serve the dinner burnt.

We have come to think of multitasking as being efficient with our time. Especially as mothers, we tend to be doing between three to five things all day long. We try to juggle to get everything done, but the truth is that we have forgotten to focus. And we have forgotten how to live in the moment. The saddest part of all this was that the only thing of eternal value in this scenario was my son’s open heart to me, wanting to share something with me. He is soon going to be a teenager, and if I don’t listen to him now, he won’t bother to tell me things in the future, the things that matter. Because what’s important enough for him to say to me, I ought to be able to listen to. But it seems like I don’t have time or brain space. My brain is juggling six things and can’t input more information without dropping something; in this case, burning dinner.

Actually, whenever I focus on only one thing, I get a lot more done. This includes being with people. When I am in my room, sitting on a chair, and my son wants to talk, I can focus great, and we have the most wonderful, deep spiritual conversations. Like the other day he was telling me how frustrated he was with his brother, who would over-react. This would infuriate him, but he had enough self-control not to show his anger. I told him he didn’t need to give in to the temptation to become angry; that God always provides a way out so that we don’t have to sin. “Look for the way out,” I said. We brainstormed ways to do this. Then we prayed that God would transform all of our hearts to help us to overcome sin. You see, I was paying attention to him because I wasn’t multitasking.

Being scatterbrained is no way to live. I was never scatterbrained until I became a mother, and I felt like there was no choice. But we do have a choice. We can choose to do laundry at the beginning of each day so that it doesn’t interfere with dinner. We can ask God how to eliminate action clutter, things that don’t matter that we happen to be doing. And we can learn to be present, to live and breathe, and to do one thing at a time.

Saturday: A Day in the Life

Saturday, January 21st, 2012

a-day-in-the-lifeThis morning my husband took the boys to the Men’s prayer breakfast. After breakfast, they all went on a factory tour of Goodrich, which apparently doesn’t sell tires any more; they make the brakes of large aircraft. The tour lasted an hour, and apparently it was fascinating.

As soon as I got up, I had my cup of coffee while posting a new YouTube video. I answered some e-mails and tried to find an archived e-mail that was important. I finally found it and answered it, since my husband had expressed interest in something I wasn’t willing to do again unless something changed. I prayed about it and sat there.

a-day-in-the-life-2Meanwhile Rachel and I were alone in the house. She asked if we could have a tea party, and I said yes. We made some fruit tea, and she poured it into thimble-small cups and stirred in a tiny spoon of sugar. She did this maybe a dozen times for each of us. “Can we have a truffle with it?” she asked. I set a truffle on each of our tiny plates, and we cut them with our tiny knives.

After tea, we did an art project with one of her Christmas presents. We mixed two different colors of paint and swooshed it onto a large piece of paper, with brushes that looked like mops. One of the three brushes broke, and I wasn’t impressed. She looked like she was about to cry, but I told her they were lame anyway, and let’s dance instead. So I put on some sappy Carpenters music, and we danced around and giggled.

After eating scrambled eggs, she went downstairs to play “Oregon Trail” on the computer. I spent some time in prayer and Bible reading. Apparently the entire Bible is full of commands to help the poor. It’s extremely clear, so I’m not exactly sure why I’ve never heard a sermon on it.

As soon as the boys got home, two of my sons started changing into their basketball uniforms. Then we all left to their basketball game. My youngest son scored his first basket today. He looked so short and little compared to the other players, and I burst out whooping when I saw him score, because I couldn’t believe my eyes.

My in-laws picked up donuts on the way to our house after the game, and we visited for a short time. As soon as they left, I yelled, “Everyone lie down for 45 minutes!” The house was suddenly quiet as we rested. I literally collapsed into bed and felt like a rock. I’ve been sick with a cold and was only pretending to be normal.

We Don’t Need a Cart

Friday, January 13th, 2012

supermarket-humor

“We don’t need a cart,” I said to my kids as we walked into the grocery store. “We only need a few things, and we can carry them.”

On the way to the produce section, I saw bread. “Oh, yeah, we’re almost out of bread,” I thought aloud as I handed my daughter two loaves of bread. I walked over to the oranges and placed six oranges into one of those flimsy bags and handed it to one of my sons.

I quickly walked past several aisles, noticing that I could actually read the signs now that I have glasses. I turned the corner and grabbed dishwasher detergent and handed it to another son, along with dish soap.

By then the orange bag had exploded, and two oranges rolled across one aisle. A random woman scowled as she stepped around my oranges, and I told one empty-handed son to pick up the two oranges. I quickly turned around and continued shopping. I handed a large bag of toilet paper to my oldest son, who for some reason started to do a comedy routine, pretending like it was heavy and that he couldn’t see over the top of it. (He could.)

Walking quickly causes my children to “hop to” and follow me, because otherwise they will be left in the dust (and they don’t like being lost.) So they quietly jogged behind me as I walked at a fast clip. Did I say quietly? I meant noisily. And did I say that this was during a school day, where people knew that we were either playing hooky or homeschooling?

I didn’t think about how I was going to carry 6 yogurt containers that my husband wanted, back when I said, “We don’t need a cart.” I stacked them like one tall tower in one hand, using my chin to hold the top of the tower in place. “Oh, wait, we also need eggs,” I said, but all of my children’s hands were full, so I had to use my hand that wasn’t being used to hold the tower of yogurt. Just try checking whether the eggs are cracked with one hand next time you’re at the grocery store, and you’ll understand how it was. And imagine that hand has a crumpled list of groceries in it, a much shorter list than the assortment of items my children and I were now carrying.

“Okay, we’re done!” I said to the kids, walking quickly to the checkout before either the yogurt pillar or precarious eggs fell to a ruinous end.

“Mom, the breads are opening!” yelled my daughter in dismay as she showed me that both bread bags were partially opened, with the clip thing off them. I told her to calm down and follow me. We placed everything on the conveyor belt, and I gently shook the bread back into place and put the clip on it. The cashier looked at me in amazement, since she was trying to fix the other bread bag but couldn’t. I said, “Here,” and I took the bag and shook the bread back into place, replacing the clip. The cashier said nothing as I walked out of the grocery store with my children.

Did I Meet Last Year’s Resolutions?

Friday, December 30th, 2011

resolutions

What’s the point of making resolutions if we don’t actually follow through? Most people can’t even remember what their resolutions were. I don’t usually make resolutions, but last year I was challenged to make a vision board with goals that I had for myself for the new year. So let’s see if I did them.

  1. I want to continue drawing closer to God, yielding to His Spirit moment by moment.” I’ve actually done this, more this year than ever before. I would still love to feel the presence of God in greater measure. There have been times in my life where the presence of the Holy Spirit was so intense. Unfortunately those were times when I had the greatest need for Him. In other words, it seems like suffering brings on the Holy Spirit because I’m more likely to fling my soul in His direction. But I’m reluctant to pray for suffering. There must be a way to walk in the presence of God in great measure without all the suffering. If I find the answer, I’ll let you know.
  2. I would like to go on more dates with my husband this year.” Technically, this did not happen. Sometimes our dates were separated by a month or two. Then in September we signed our children up for Awana, and Tuesday nights are now our date nights.
  3. I want to stop yelling at my children. I’ve grown a lot in this area, but by the end of the year, I want to be at a point where I never yell whatsoever. Wouldn’t that be cool?” Umm… I have no idea if I’ve grown in this area. To “never yell whatsoever” I think was a bit ambitious. I can’t remember the last time I yelled at the kids, but I’m sure I have.
  4. I want to listen to my children more, to understand their heartbeat and deepen their walk with God.” I did this, but I probably could have done it more. I need to intentionally spend time one-on-one with my kids in deep conversation. Their time with me is so short. I’ll blink, and they will be grown. Just watch.
  5. I don’t want to live a virtual life. I want my life to be real.” Well, I took the summer off from the internet. So that’s something. But I’ve decided that people online are also real people. I just want to yield to God and ask Him what I ought to be doing. It’s not a sin to be on the computer unless it’s taking away from something I’m supposed to be doing.
  6. I want to live in the moment and to enjoy my husband and children, really enjoy them.” Yes, I did this! I want so much to continue to do this.
  7. I’d like to spend more time in the garden and make it look prettier, so that we have a peaceful haven just outside our own house.” Umm… No. I didn’t do this whatsoever. In fact, I let the garden die completely. The sprinkler system broke right before the Seattle and Portland conferences, and my husband said to me, “Either I fix the sprinkler system, or we cut your DVD’s.” That was a no-brainer. Bye bye, garden.
  8. I want to lose 17 pounds.” Nope. But I did something better than that. I learned to love my body. I started Zumba this year and have done it consistently. I’ve had more muscle tone this year than ever, and I’m 41. I finally accept my body, but I also exercise consistently. I haven’t weighed myself in a long time. How about that? I don’t care that I’m not perfect. I feel comfortable in my own skin, and that’s saying a lot.
  9. I want to laugh more.” I’ve cried a lot this year, but I think I’ve also laughed more. I discovered that I enjoy writing humor.
  10. I would love, love, love to have a second honeymoon with my darling husband this coming summer. I’d like to go to the Bahamas.” Yes. I don’t know how in tarnation we pulled that off financially without going into debt. It was just a sweet miracle from God.