Archive for the ‘Marriage’ Category

Marriage Articles, Webinars, and Audios

Friday, February 3rd, 2012

marriage-articlesHere are some marriage articles, webinars, and audios that often include personal stories from my life. I show you how my husband and I relate to each other. My heart is to see godly marriages where the husband and wife are truly one.

Marriage Articles:

Marriage Webinars and Workshops:

Marriage Audios:

 

Clinkerdagger

Thursday, February 2nd, 2012

ClinkerdaggerOne of the best dates of all time with my husband would have to be eating at Clinkerdagger. Even though the meal itself was special, it was the events leading up to the date that were a sweet gift from God. It was my birthday, and countless times we’ve done nothing for my birthday. I don’t expect to be honored like most women do. I’m not bratty that way. If my birthday comes and goes, I tell my husband what I want, and he gets it for me. There has never been something I’ve asked for that my husband hasn’t gotten for me, no matter what the cost. Of course, being a tightwad myself, I only ask for things I’ve wanted for a long time, and that is within our price range.

I’d seen women fuming and resentful at their husbands for getting them something stupid for their birthdays. The women mope around and say their men don’t love them. Just so you women know, men can’t read minds. They’re not clairvoyant. So if you want something, tell them. I don’t know what’s so hard about this. But let’s get back to the Clinkerdagger story.

I had gone to a yard sale, and I found a gorgeous evening dress that was a sparkling dark red. Because the yard sale was at a park, there was no way for me to try it on. Having grown up in a third world country, I knew how to bargain, so I said I’d buy the dress for fifty cents. The lady said yes. When I took the dress home, I tried it on, and it fit me perfectly.

We had no money. My husband sold something in his office for $80. Then he went to Costo and got a $100 gift card for $80 for Clinkerdagger. So God supplied the money and made it stretch. We got a babysitter (my parents) and made a reservation.

The reservation was later than we’d hoped for, so we went to the hot tub first. That was at the gym we used to be members of back then, which my husband got a discount for through his work. So whenever we went on a date, we would end at the hot tub. But this time we started there. Hot tubs are wonderful. They relax your muscles, and your body actually feels better afterwards.

So I was changing into my evening gown at the gym, and I hadn’t decided whether to wear sandals or high heels. I asked a random woman in the locker room. She said, “Definitely the sandals.” She raved about how awesome the dress looked and asked me where I bought it. “I got it at a yard sale for fifty cents.” “Shut up!” she said in surprise. I laughed.

When we got to Clinkerdagger, we were seated. I looked around at the medieval decorations. This is definitely my favorite restaurant. Bummer that it’s so expensive. After ordering our food, I went to use the restroom. As I was walking back from the restroom, my husband looked at me. I could tell in his eyes that he really liked the dress.

After eating a delicious meal, I just sat there looking at my husband. The entire date was wonderful from start to finish, a sweet gift from God.

You are Not Your Own

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

you-are-not-you-ownI recently read an article where a woman cut her hair short because she was now a mom. Her husband hated her new haircut and was disappointed that his opinion didn’t matter whatsoever. The writer of the article said, “Grow up,” to this man. She wrote that there is nothing wrong with a mom looking like a mom, which translated means, go ahead and look frumpy because who the heck cares what your husband thinks. This entire mindset is sin.

Let me start by saying that my best friend from childhood is a woman. Let’s say I did something somewhat superficial that would affect her life, disregarding her opinion, even when she had to live with the ramifications of what I did. Then she asks me, “How come you didn’t even ask me?” and I answered, “Who cares what you think?” This would be disrespectful to my friend, who is a woman. How much more so if you’re doing this to your husband?

“The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.” (I Corinthians 7:4)

At marriage, a woman’s body belongs to her husband, and a man’s body belongs to his wife. You don’t rule your own body, believe it or not. And it cuts both ways. Let’s say you don’t want your husband to have a long, scraggly beard that is smelly and disgusting. Because even though that is a superficial thing, it affects your attraction to your spouse.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not going to withdraw from my husband if he looks ugly. I’m not. And I’m not a superficial person. If he gets into a car crash and looks all mangled like a monster, I will love and cherish him and kiss his sweet face til the day I die. But that is no excuse for him to purposely look ugly for me.

You should also be willing to live with the consequences of your actions. The woman who cut her hair short and didn’t care what her husband thought now has to live with the fact that she is not as attractive to her husband. Likewise, if my husband shaves off the close clipped beard that I love, he is not as appealing to me, even though of course I will still love him. But the bedroom ought to matter. If the bedroom doesn’t matter to the woman, then her husband is not her priority. Her marriage will suffer because she doesn’t care about pleasing her husband, and her marriage has taken a back seat.

New Year’s Eve (First Night Spokane)

Monday, January 2nd, 2012

first-night-spokane-new-years-eve

On New Year’s Eve, my husband and I went to an event called “First Night Spokane.” Even though we’ve lived here for 11 years, this is the first time we’ve gone. Many events, demonstrations, concerts, and shows take place in the downtown area, with fireworks to finish off the evening. You can get in to all the events for free if you have a button (which costs $12). The event lasts six hours.

We might take our kids next year, because there were pottery throwing demonstrations, wool weaving, crown-making, ice sculpting, and chain-mail making. The children’s museum was also open. And children 10 and under go free with a buttoned adult.

ice-dragon

My husband and I started the evening by riding on an antique carousel. I realized that everything was blurry, and my husband handed me my new glasses. Even though most people consider a carousel to be a slow ride pointlessly going in circles like our lives, I really love the exquisite detail of each horse. I’ve always loved carousels because of the ornate artwork.

ice-slide

Ice sculpting took place outside. Since the theme for this year was dinosaurs, the men were carving the ice into dinosaurs, fossils, and dragons. My favorite was the Loch Ness Monster. There was also an ice slide with colorful lights embedded on the inside, which children were sliding down.

We listened to a violin player who added drums and other sounds to his violin music. Other buildings contained bands which played salsa or blues or rock. People were dancing, and I looked sweetly at my husband, and he rolled his eyes.

violinist

Suddenly we were hungry, so we went to a Chinese restaurant that my husband had been wanting to check out. We split a salad and a main meal, which was delicious. The lanterns hung on the ceiling were gorgeous and added to the ambiance.

Closer to midnight, we were randomly walking around. We went to the crown-making place, and the materials on the long tables looked like they had been hit by a tornado. My husband tried to cut a piece of lace for me, because I wanted a bookmark, and the scissors were so cheap that they didn’t cut. Then they just snapped in half. My husband and I backed away from the table, whistling a tune, so as not to be noticed.

One good thing about the evening is that policemen and guards were sprinkled like salt and pepper all over, so you felt safe. Only about a third of the people were inebriated. The others had children with them, with bags under their eyes, looking tired rather than inebriated.

chinese-place

We counted down to midnight, and fireworks lit up the sky in magnificent splashes of color. “Happy New Year!” I shouted to my husband, grabbing his face and kissing him. Unfortunately I was so cold, my depth perception was off because of my new glasses, and my teeth were chattering, so I accidentally bit his lip. (It wasn’t hard.) “Ow,” he said, instead of wishing me a Happy New Year, and we skipped off like kids to the car. It was a lovely evening.