Susan’s Wacky Travel Tips (Road Trip Edition)


Here are the top 10 best travel tips for road trips with children:

  1. Forget barf bags. Pull over and open the sliding door.
  2. If you have a family of 6 or more, you should probably get two rooms, or you’ll be stepping on your children during the night.
  3. Choose motels without neon signs, bullet holes, or sirens going off in the parking lot. (Honey, if you’re reading this, please pay attention for next time.)
  4. Charge your children a dollar for every time they say, β€œAre we there yet?” and you’ll have enough money to buy them snacks at the next gas station.
  5. Wear ear plugs, and you will enter a peaceful haven of bliss. If someone tries to get your attention, just smile and nod calmly.
  6. If you don’t have a headache, go ahead and play music or listen to a book on CD. Or play games and pretend you’re excited about playing them.
  7. Try to drive your spouse bonkers by singing rounds with your kids, old MacDonald with so many animals that couldn’t have possibly been at the farm, or cheerfully singing β€œThis is the Song that Never Ends.”
  8. Stop at sights along the way to give the illusion that you’re actually on vacation.
  9. If your motel bed is broken and the toilet overflowing and you’ve just walked into the room, go ahead and ask to be put into another room. (They actually gave us two rooms for the price of one!) Otherwise if you sleep on the broken bed, you will feel like you are constantly trying to dig yourself out of a grave. (If you’ve slept on a broken bed, you know exactly what I’m saying.)
  10. And now for number 10… Drum roll, please… Take lots of pictures, because you want to remember this miserable road trip as having been fun, dang it.

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8 Responses to “Susan’s Wacky Travel Tips (Road Trip Edition)”

  1. jen says:

    I used to tell my children every time they asked “are we there yet” made the trip longer! Little fib but it kept them from asking it a million times….

  2. I LOVE this one. I’m sharing it on Facebook! πŸ™‚

  3. Sounds like you need to enter to win the Vacation Journal giveaway I have going on! πŸ˜€

    I’m wishing I had done more of #10 on our epic 3 state adventure of 2007. I didn’t know it would be our last family vacation of the decade, LOL.

    • Susan says:

      It’s been awhile since we’ve gone on a road trip, too, but my husband says he wants to go to the Grand Canyon this year. We’ll see…

  4. I personally really enjoy #5! Ear plugs would make road trips far more tolerable!

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